


Doomed

by fallingintoplace



Category: Bring Me The Horizon, Sleeping With Sirens
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Orchestra, Angst, Depression, Eating Disorders, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, M/M, Past Child Abuse, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-30
Updated: 2015-11-25
Packaged: 2018-04-29 01:11:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5110913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallingintoplace/pseuds/fallingintoplace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oli moves to the US after his abusive father is arrested. He ends up going to school where he falls in love with the beautiful boy with the blue eyes. </p><p> </p><p>It sounds really crappy and it probably is really crappy, but read it anyways!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Can't Drown My Demons, They Know How To Swim

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is my first post so its probably really bad. Tell me please if there are any errors or if you have any suggestions. Constructive Criticism is appreciated!

The alarm blared in my ear and I groaned as I turned it off. First day of school I thought. I stumbled out of bed and wriggled into the least dirty pair of black skinny jeans I could find lying on my floor. I tugged on a faded band shirt and grabbed my backpack and viola, then headed downstairs to wait for the bus.  
“At least it’s a Thursday,” Tom said. We had just moved to California from England after…no, don’t think about it, and were staring our first day of school since arriving half-way through the school year. I couldn’t say I was looking forward to starting senior year in the middle.  
Our bus pulled around the corner and we hopped on. I headed immediately to the back and pushed my earbuds in and turned up the volume. As other people got on the bus throughout the route, I noticed one of the most beautiful boys I had ever seen. He had longish dark brown hair and bright blue eyes. He slid into a seat next to his friend and they started chatting and laughing. I sighed, and sat in silence next to my brother for the rest of the bus ride.  
The bus pulled up to an ugly brick building with teens milling about on the grounds. Tom and I walked to the office to get our schedules then split ways as he headed to maths and I went to drop off my instrument in the orchestra room. My tour guide introduced himself as Vic and said that he was in orchestra as well, but said he played the stand-up bass.  
Vic led me to my first class, English, where I was given a copy of the book we were reading and sat in the back. The teacher started class with attendance, and then introduced me to the class, who chorused “Hello” to me.  
“Fresh meat,” someone said and the rest of the class laughed. I clenched my jaw, irritated, and leaned back in my chair, wishing I had music to listen to that would help me relax. I hated social situations, especially at school, after getting bullied for many years back in England. I zoned out for the rest of class, waiting for the bell to ring and class to end. I had art next, and I had Vic point me the way before heading off to the Fine Arts wing.  
The art teacher seemed cool. He had bright red hair and paint all over his clothes and was playing the Misfits in the background. He instructed us to paint or draw our most recent emotion. I used some blues and grays and painted them onto the canvas in thick, jagged strokes. I was painting the icy coldness I felt in the frozen tundra of my insides.  
Orchestra was next, and I couldn’t wait. I had been playing the viola for eight years and it had turned into the hobby I had left. I had been diagnosed with severe depression, social anxiety and general anxiety a few years ago, and slowly was drained of energy until the only thing that could calm me down was listening to music or playing the viola. Music had turned into my best, and only, friend.  
When the bell rang, I practically jumped out of my chair and ran to the orchestra room. I got lost on the way, and barely made it to class on time. As I walked in, I saw the beautiful boy again. He was sitting in the viola section in the back talking to Vic. He turned around and saw me staring. He shot me a smile and I blushed and turned away. The orchestra teacher, a man named Mr. Iero called me over and I went.  
“Oli, can you sit with Kellin over in the back for now? I’ll have you come in for an audition and will put you in a different seat afterwards.”  
“Sure,” I said.  
“Hey, Kellin! Can you come over here?” Mr. Iero called and the beautiful boy stood up. I rolled his name over in my mind. What a pretty name for a pretty person.  
“Hey. I’m Kellin. You must be Oli. Vic mentioned you earlier,” Kellin said.  
“Yeah. You play viola, correct?” I asked.  
“Yup. It’s my passion. That, and singing. I’m in the afterschool chorus. You should join!”  
“I’d love to, but I don’t sing.”  
“That’s a shame. Anyways, we should probably sit down.” We headed back to our seats and started to tune. The music that Mr. Iero gave me was rather easy. We were playing the classic Brandenburg Concerto, all of the movements, and a few other pieces. I was eager to start playing. Once we did, it took me a moment to get back into the swing of playing, as I hadn’t had the energy to play since before we left England, but once we finished the warm-up scale, my fingers had warmed up, and everything came back. My hands loosened up, and my vibrato came almost naturally.  
I was packing up after class when Kellin came up behind me and spoke.  
“Dude! You’re really good!”  
“Thanks. I’ve been playing for a while now,” I responded shyly.  
“Well, I guess I’ll see you around?”  
“Of course!” I said. I couldn’t help but wonder why a guy so nice and cool as Kellin would want to talk with someone as awful as me, but I shook that thought out of my head. Letting my negative thoughts get out of control wouldn’t be helpful. I sighed, and headed to my next class, my arms aching for me to cut.  
I took a detour and stopped in the bathroom and leaned against the sink staring at my reflection in the mirror. I hated everything about the face that stared back. I was weak, ugly, and an awful person. I didn’t deserve to live, but I k new if I killed myself, it would destroy Tom and my mother, and they had already gone through so much. I couldn’t do that to them. Instead, I settled for slicing my skin open. I slipped into one of the stalls and took a razor blade out of my pocket. With a deep breath, I dug the sharp blade into the skin on my arm. With the sharp pain came relief that I could actually feel something, and I made a few more cuts before staunching the blood with toilet paper and pulled on a hoodie to hide the cuts. I finally felt ready to face the rest of the day.


	2. Can You Feel My Heart?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its super short!

Kellin’s POV

I was so fucked. I was in love with my best friend, who was undeniably straight. It was a tragedy of epic proportions. It had started out as a little crush and had turn into full-blown head-over-heels love. And it was just so easy to love Vic. He had the prettiest hair, long and soft and kind warm eyes. He was an absolute virtuoso on the bass, and had his own band.  
We were sitting at lunch when Vic suddenly shouted “Hey, Oli! Come sit with us!” The boy’s eyes widened in shock and slowly made his way through the lunchroom to join us at our table. He said thanks in his quiet, slightly hoarse voice. He had a kinda cute British accent.  
“So, Oli. How do you like California?” Vic asked.  
“It’s rather dry,” he responded, still with a deer in the headlights type look on his face. He seemed really uncomfortable talking so I took the pressure off him.  
“God, this food is awful,” I complained, picking at my slimy piece of pizza. Oli shot me a grateful look, with a little brightness in his usually sad eyes. I wondered why his eyes were always filled with so much pain. Something about him made me want to give him a big hug.  
Lunch was over soon after and we had to go to class. Vic and I had math together and we always sat together in the back. We rarely paid attention and usually just chatted while the teacher droned on and on. But this time I wanted to talk about something serious. I couldn’t stop thinking about Oli’s eyes and how they held so much sorrow.  
“Hey, Vic? Why do you think Oli seems so sad?” I whispered.  
“I don’t know but I think it’s probably none of our business,” he whispered back.  
“You’re probably right.” He hummed in response and we turned back to the whiteboard.  
________________________________________________________________________________________________  
I woke up screaming. Shit, the night terrors were back. My dreams had been full of shadows and darkness and all sorts of fear I couldn’t even begin to describe. But the worst part of the dream was Oli’s haunted brown eyes. I checked my phone for the time and it was only one in the morning. I sighed. There was no way I was going back to sleep tonight.  
I looked into the mirror as I got ready that morning and sighed at the dark circles under my eyes. I was going to need a hell of a lot of caffeine to get me through today. I grabbed an apple and said goodbye to my mom and step-dad and headed to the bus stop with a traveler’s mug of coffee.  
I almost fell asleep standing up waiting for the bus and was startled alert by honking. I got on the bus and noticed Oli sitting in the back alone. I slid into the seat next to him and he gave me a weak smile.  
“Jesus, I’m so tired,” I groaned, the caffeine not kicking in yet.  
“Rough night?” he asked with a slight quirk of his lips.  
“Yeah, I got like no sleep last night.”  
“I’m sorry. But at least you have coffee, right?”  
“Yeah, I couldn’t survive high school without caffeine.” Chatting with Oli was so easy. There were no expectations and he could actually be pretty funny. But smiles were rare and it was obvious he was really sad. “Hey, Oli? If you ever need anything, you can always talk to me.” Shit. That must’ve sounded weird. But it worked. He gave me a grateful look and I smiled back.  
“Thanks, but I think I’m fine.” I could tell he was lying through his teeth but I decided not to push. Not today, at least

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading and please please please comment if you have any tips, constructive criticism or plot ideas! I love you all!


	3. Am I Being Punished For What I've Done?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings for self harm and abuse. Please be safe.

Oli’s POV

I was weak. Weak, disgusting, and just plain horrible. I sat in the corner of my room with my blade in hand and drowning in self-loathing. I cut because it made me feel, but more because I knew I deserved the pain. That’s what my father always told me. No. Don’t think about him. But it was too late.  
The door slams and footsteps echo trough the hallway. I hide in my closet, curled up in a ball, knowing He’ll still be able to find me.   
“Oli! Where the fuck are you?” He shouts. I curl up a little tighter and choke back a sob. I can’t make noise or He’ll know where I am. The closet door swings open and I squeeze deeper into the corner. He yanks my arm and drags me form my hiding spot. He kicks me in the stomach, punctuating every hit with a word.   
“You…are…the…most…awful…weak…worthless…child…I’ve…ever….had…the…misfortune…to…ever…meet.” I’m crying in pain by this point, but it only makes Him madder. He lifts me up and punches my face. Agony explodes in my eye and I whimper.  
“Weak,” He mutters and punches me another time, knocking me out.  
I came back from my flashback sobbing. I was only ten when that happened, and it only got worse. My father terrorized my family for most of my life. As soon as I was aware of what was happening, I tried to protect my mother and Tom. I took most of the beatings but couldn’t stop the verbal abuse. I’m still crying, and I started cutting my thighs until they are a bloody mess. I soaked up the blood with some tissue and wrap them up. I lived for the feeling of the cold blade breaking through my skin. Some days, it felt like the only thing keeping me alive.  
I started to get ready for bed. I stripped out of the clothes I wore that day, and stared at my reflection in the mirror. I took in the scars on my legs and arms, some from me, some from my father. I looked at my body and shuddered. I’m so fat. I need to lose some weight. I sigh. I’ll deal with that tomorrow.  
I woke up with tears still wet on my cheeks. I wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with school today. At least I hadn’t gotten bullied yet. I pulled on my favorite Motionless in White shirt and my black jeans from yesterday. I winced as the rough denim slide over my still raw cuts. I stumbled down the stairs, tears still leaking from my eyes.  
“Oli! What’s wrong?” Tom asks, concern lacing his voice.   
“I’m fine. Just had a rough night.”  
“Well, if you need anything, just come talk to me.” I hug my brother while internally screaming weak. You can’t let your little brother take care of you. You have to be strong.  
The only class I was looking forward to was orchestra. Playing my viola always helped calm me down. But today, even playing my favorite songs didn’t work. It didn’t help that the moment Kellin saw me, he exclaimed about how sad and tired I look. That was just great. I was falling deeper and deeper in love with Kellin Quinn. It wasn’t fair, considering I’ve only known him for a few days. He was just so amazing. Kind, considerate and sweet, he was one of the nicest people I’d ever met, someone who truly cared about his friends. I was so screwed.  
Tom sat next to me on the bus home. We had grown closer since we moved to the States. My dad had ostracized me form the rest of my family, and neither of us dared to disobey Him. Tom turned out to be nice and had a great sense of humor. We sat talking and laughing until Tom got a serious look in his eyes.   
“Oli, I think you need help. You suffered the most from Dad out of the three of us and I think you have depression. Mom and I know you cut,” Tom said.  
“Tom! I’m fine. You don’t need to worry about me.”  
“But you didn’t deny it, did you?” Tom said with a sad smile. I got up and slide into the seat in front of us and listened to my headphones for the rest of the ride home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw Sleeping With Sirens last night and I got to touch Kellin's arm! I'm on the top of the world right now. Chapter title is from End of the World by Juliet Simms. Comments are appreciated, and I hope you have a good day! xoxoLola


	4. Can You Feel My Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that this took so long. I was hospitalized for some mental health problems. This is really short, but i wanted to post so I wrote this quickly.

Kellin’s POV

I felt guilty. I ahd started thinking about Oli the way I used to think about Vic. Li ad cute floppy hair and a sweet smile. I felt like I was betraying Vic. But maybe dating Oli would take my mind off my unrequited love. I decided to text Oli to see if we could hang out. I just really wanted to talk to him and hearhis adorable little laugh.

Oli’s POV

It was the finally the weekend. After a full week of hell, I could finally relax. My phone buzzed and I snatched it, hitting the home button to read the text.

Kellin: hey oli. What r u up 2  
Oli: not much. How bout u?  
Kellin: Im bored. Can I come 2 yr house???  
Oli: sure. come over whenever 

Kellin was coming over! This had to be the best thing ever, spending part of the weekend with my crush. I was just so excited.   
I had been thinking about what Tom had said. I didn’t want my little brother to have to protect me, but I did think I might have depression, because wanting to kill yourself was probably not normal. I spent a good part of my free time fantasizing how to kill myself. It would be just so easy, swallow a bottle of pills and slit my wrists, or hang myself or… No. I can’t think like that. My death would destroy my mom’s life and she’s already gone through so much. And it would mean that my father won.  
The best way to deal with these thoughts was to cut. I knew I shouldn’t, but it was all I could think of and it was just so tempting. It helped so much. It allowed me to feel. I grabbed my razor and just started slicing. My legs were covered with criss crossing cuts at various stages of healing. I had stopped cutting on my arms a long time ago so I wouldn’t have to worry about my sleeves riding up, but today I decided to cut on my forearms. It was winter, so I could wear long sleeves. Eventually, my arms were a bloody mess and I felt better.  
All of a sudden, I heard the door bell ring, and Kellin’s and my mom’s voices floated up the stairs.  
“Yeah. He’s just in his room. You can just head up the stairs.” I heard my mom say. I was filled with panic. There was no was way I would be able to clean up before he got here. I quickly rolled down my sleeves, stashed my razor underneath my pillow and prayed the blood wouldn’t bleed through my shirt.  
“Yo, Oli! What’s up?” Kellin burst into my room, a tornado of energy.   
“Not much,” I smiled weakly.  
“Are you alright? You seem a little pale.”  
“Yes. I’m fine!” I snapped. Kellin gave me a strange look, but shrugged it off.  
We hung out for a few hours, playing video games, eating pizza and chatting. It was probably the nicest day I had had in a long while. I was so happy I didn’t notice the spots of blood soaking through my sleeves. I didn’t notice, but Kellin did.   
“Hey, Oli? You’re bleeding.” Kellin grabbed my arm, and rolled up the sleeves. I winced, and he gasped in shock.


	5. I''m Sorry Brother, I Know I Let You Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm giving myself a pat on the back. A new update thats not five hundred words after one just yesterday? I'm rather proud. Trigger warnings for a suicide attempt. Stay safe

Oli’s POV

Shit. Shit, shit, shit. This was not good. Kellin paled, turned around and ran out of my room. A few seconds later, I heard the door slam shut. Fuck. I had just lost my closest friend. I probably deserved it, too. I must be an awful person. I was so mad at myself. I fucked up everything. I curled up on my bed and cried. I missed Kellin so much already.  
A knock sounded at my door. I croaked a “come in” in response and Tom peeked his head in.  
“I heard your crying. Do you want to talk about it?”  
“I think I just lost a friend,” I sniffled.  
“Too bad for him, then. He just missed out on being friends with an amazing person.” Yeah, right. I’m a despicable human being who didn’t deserve to live. That’s probably why Kellin ran out so fast. He must hate me now. All of this just made me want to kill myself even more. It was obvious that Kellin wouldn’t care.  
“Hey, Tom? Can I be alone for a bit?”  
“Of course. Whatever you need, bro.” He left and I jumped out of bed. I was finally going to end my miserable existence. I snuck into the bathroom and grabbed the bottle of Excedrin. I downed the bottle, probably forty or more pills, and slashed my wrists vertically. I lied back down in my bed and waited for unconsciousness to take over. I couldn’t wait to die.

Kellin’s POV

Oh my fucking god. Oli cut. He hurt himself. I wanted to cry, that someone so beautiful would hurt so bad that they felt the need to do that. And there were just so many cuts! The memory of all that blood made me faintly sick. What made me sicker was the fact that I just ran out. Shit. He must hate me now. I would. I had to go back and apologize.  
I knocked on the door to Oli’s house and his brother let me in.  
“What the hell were you thinking?” He yelled at me. “Oli’s delicate and you fucking broke him!”  
“That’s why I’m here. I want to apologize.”  
“Seriously? You think apologizing is gonna make it better? You’re gonna have to do some serious groveling for forgiveness.”  
“I’ll do anything. I feel so bad.”  
“Alright. I’ll let you talk to him but promise me you’ll never hurt him again.”  
“I promise.”  
“He’s upstairs in his room. Go on up.” Tom opened up the door to let me in. I rushed up the stairs and knocked on Oli’s door. No response. I knocked again and waited, but heard nothing. I opened the door and saw Oli lying on the floor, passed out and his arms dripping blood.   
“Tom? TOM! Get up here!” Tom rushed up the stairs and gasped when he saw Oli. “Tom, we have to call 911.” I whipped out my cell phone and told the operator that I thought my friend had tried to kill himself.  
The ambulance got there in no time and loaded Oli’s unresponsive body onto a stretcher. They let Tom ride in the ambulance, but I had to drive myself to the hospital. The doctors had to pump Oli’s stomach, stitch up his wrists and put in an IV to replace his lost blood. Tom and I sat in Oli’s hospital room listening to the beep of the heart monitor, waiting for Oli to wake up. His mom walked in a few minutes later, and she gave Tom a hug. They sat together, Mrs. Sykes faintly crying.  
Finally, Oli woke up. He surveyed the room and then fixed my a glare that was filled with so much loathing it stabbed my heart.

Oli’s POV

God, why was I alive? I had tried so hard. Then I saw Kellin. He must have found my body. I glared at him and he winced, looking pained. How dare he ruin my life then take away my only escape? I was so pissed. The ache to be dead was pounding through my body and I felt weak and dizzy from the medicine and blood loss.  
The doctor came in and talked about what was going to happen. He and my mom discussed the pros and cons of sending me to psychiatric hospital, and in the end, they decided yes. The ambulance, for the second time that day, rushed me to the nearest mental hospital and sent me through admissions. They showed me my room and eft me there, alone with my thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed it! Title from Luck by American Authors. Kudos are appreciated and suggestions and plot ideas are very much wanted. Thanks! xoxoLola


	6. Am I the Only One Who Thinks You Should Stay Alive?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so short. I've had a lot of free time and I wanted to get this posted tonight.

Oli’s POV

Mental hospitals were fucking boring. Everything was safety proofed and it was group therapy after group after group. The patients moved around in slow motion, weighed down by depression. Everyone there was at least somewhat fucked up. My mom and Tom came to visit everyday, but we would usually just sit there, staring awkwardly at each other.  
On the day before my discharge, Kellin visited me. I still had a crush on him but I was so overwhelmingly pissed at him for saving my life that I could barely look at him. Kellin stood there awkwardly, shuffling his feet before he spoke.  
“I’m really sorry, you know, for, like, running out like that,” he said, slightly embarrassed. “I feel really bad that you’re here and I feel like it’s my fault.”  
“I’m not mad at you for that. But it is your fault that I’m here. You should have just let me die.” Kellin looked frightened at that, and muttered “sorry” again before turning around and leaving the room. Again. I sighed, and flopped down on my bed.   
I was called out for group and then dinner. I took one look at my food and pushed it away. I knew that if I ate, it would make me fatter than I already am. Anyways, I was too anxious to eat. I ended up skipping the rest of the meals the next day until my discharge. I couldn’t wait to get out. All I wanted to do was go home and cut.

Kellin’s POV

Oli was back at school today, but avoided me. He traded stand partners so he wouldn’t have to sit with me, and disappeared during lunch. This carried on for a few days until I confronted him as he was leaving the orchestra room.   
“Why are you avoiding me?”   
“I’m still deciding whether or not to forgive you,” he responded.  
“Why would you forgive me? You should be thanking me! I saved your life!”  
“Did you ever think that about the fact that I want to be dead? That you forced me to suffer longer?”  
“Oli, it hurts me to see someone so beautiful be so sad!”  
“I’m not beautiful.”  
“Yes, you are, Oli. I hate it that you can’t see it.” Oli spun around and stalked off. What had I said? I had probably driven the wedge in between us a little deeper. That was bad, because my little crush had developed into a full-blown infatuation. I went home and sat alone on the bus, since Vic was staying back for a bass sectional. Why couldn’t I be confidant like him? Then I’d be able to just ask Oli on a date. But he’s probably not even gay. It didn’t even matter, he probably hated me so bad that he would never forgive me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed it! Kudos and comments appreciated! xoxoLola


	7. The End

Kellin’s POV  
Today was the day. Today was the day I was going to ask Oli on a date. If he rejected me, no harm done since our relationship was already in shambles. That didn’t mean I wasn’t worried. Doubt and worries swirled through my head. I had a plan, though. I was going to corner him after orchestra and ask him. I even brought a red rose for him. All I needed was for him to say yes.

Vic was in on the plan. He called Oli over and I went up to talk to him.  
“Hey, Oli? I was hoping you would like to go on a date with me this Saturday.” I held the rose out as a peace offering. Something that was somewhere between shock and hope flickered in his eyes before they hardened.  
“Is this some sort of joke? You have to first ruin my life and now you have to mock me?” Oli spun on his heel and tried to walk away but I grabbed on to his arm.  
“Oli, I’m serious. I really want to go on a date with you. You’re sweet, funny, cute and I really like you.” Oli’s eyes narrowed but he looked like he was considering my offer. Then he smiled.  
“Sure, Kellin. I would love to go on a date with you.” He took the rose, and with one last smile, went to his next class.

 

Oli’s POV  
Oh my god. Oh my god oh my god oh my fucking god. Kellin Quinn asked me out on a date! I had to admit I was a little skeptical at first, but he seemed sincere. Maybe he didn’t hate me after all. I still wanted to die, wanted to kill myself, but for the first time in a long while, I actually had a little hope. Maybe, just maybe, Kellin could help me face my demons.  
Saturday came, and I spent the entire day in panic mode, worried that Kellin wouldn’t show up, wouldn’t like me, wouldn’t care. I knew that that was illogical but it just seemed so real to me. I ended up wearing a pair of ripped skinny jeans, a band shirt with a red plaid shirt over it. We had a very nice date, going to see a movie and ended with a walk in the park. We were holding hands, walking along a path when Kellin’s voice broke the silence.  
“Why did you try to kill yourself?” I winced at the question. Kellin, noticing my discomfort, rephrased his question. “I mean, if you don’t want to tell me, you don’t have to.”  
“It’s alright. I guess I just hated myself so much that I just wanted to give up. I still do.”  
“Oli, it’s such a shame that such a wonderful person hates themselves.”  
“It’s one thing to hear it, but another to actually believe it.”   
“I just want you to feel better, Oli. I really like you and I want you to really like you, too.” I chuckled at what he said.  
“I’ll work on it. Maybe I can see if I can get some antidepressants or something like that. But could we talk about something else?”  
“Of course.” The rest of the date when on, and at the end, Kellin kissed me before dropping me off.  
The next day, I scheduled an appointment with a psychiatrist. I got prescribed some meds and started to therapy, but it wasn’t helping as much as I wished. I was still cutting, but I hadn’t told Kellin that yet.

Kellin’s POV

Oli and I had been dating for two weeks. It had been two weeks of pure bliss. I was so in love with Oli it was almost painful. We went on a date to the park, and when I grabbed his arm to pull him towards the swing set, he winced.   
“Oli, what’s wrong?” I asked.  
“N-Nothing,” he muttered. A horrible suspicion crept up on me and I quickly rolled up his sleeve. It was my turn to wince. His arm was covered in a lattice-work of cuts and scars. My brow furrowed and I groaned.  
“I’m sorry! Please, please don’t hit me.” His eyes were clouded with fear and my heart ached for this beautiful boy.   
“Jesus, Oli! I’m not mad and I’m definitely not going to hit you. I just don’t get why you didn’t tell me.” Oli visibly relaxed, but wouldn’t stop apologizing. “Wait. You thought I was going to hit you?”  
“My… My father used to do that when he was angry. And when he was drunk.” Oh my god. My poor Oli. How dare any monster hurt him? “But it’s alright now. He got arrested and we moved here.”   
“And thank god for that. I really love you, Oli. I’ll be here for you through everything.”

Oli’s POV

I told Kellin a bit about my past and it felt like a weight was lifted off of my chest. He told me he loved me! That helped a little. It didn’t cure my depression, but it gave me something more to live for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all, folks! Sorry about the bad fic and the abrupt ending. I ran out of ideas by the second chapter, so its bad. Oh well. I hope you enjoyed it!

**Author's Note:**

> So the next chapter is gonna be in Kellin's POV. I might not be able to post regularly, but I'll try to post at least once a week.


End file.
